Knowing that
bad news will be given about a life threatening illness is really tough.
It is a shock to the person with the illness and everyone around them.
It stimulates a feeling of fear and brings an overwhelming sense of
tiredness that precludes normal comprehension. The hardest part is
trying to remember what was said in the visit about the illness. The
doctor's office is often crowded and unpleasant. Some people describe
that after hearing the diagnosis of a brain tumor, nothing else
registered. This memory loss happens to most people.
When hearing news
of this seriousness, I suggest that another person, preferably a trusted
friend moderately familiar with medical surroundings, attend to take
notes and just be there. I've been the note taker, and the clinic visit
can feel so intense that continuing to write is essential. Words that
were said were written down, and everyone can reread them later. I found
it amazing to see what written on the paper and couldn’t remember that
it was said. Treatment options may be given in these meetings and side
effects may be discussed. Referrals to social workers or other medical
contacts may be given. Transcribing the notes and presenting them to the
individual is always appreciated. They can be placed in a binder where
summaries of the medical visits are kept.
Having a life threatening
diagnosis truly changes everything a person does and how they will
proceed. Having friends help to process some of the information can lighten
the load.
Mary Lovely, RN, PhD
Medical Information Specialist / Assistant Director of Research
Image: http://tulane.edu/som/departments/medicine/pulmdis/sleep-center.cfm
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